Gratitude & Grief all at once?

Morning.. much of last week I fluctuated between Gratitude & Grief, Joy & Sadness, Appreciation & Frustration. Sound familiar to any of you? I have so many things I am Grateful for while at the same time those same things can bring grief. Like this: I am so grateful for how God has provided for my girls and how they are a new generation doing better than Mom was at their age..homes, good husbands, and the list goes on. Then here came the Wild Fires..both of them had fires to close for comfort and the Lilac Fire is much better contained but, not Out…which is just down the hill from my youngest. I am so full of gratitude for the protective hedge God has kept around their homes while at the same time grieving for those who lost their homes .. like all those in the Senior Mobile Home Park just down the road in Bonsall. My answer is just keep Praying.

Then there is Appreciation & Frustration, Joy & Sadness I can tap on all in one example: Work. I so appreciate being able to work remote with my job and in the big picture I just I love my Director, my team, & working the AR.  Success is doing the work you love. So, for the most part All of this brings me Joy! Yet, at the same time there are some days there are serious stressors & frustrations rise up tapping my ole self that make me wanna scream sometimes and do make me grumble and complaint. Sure as I allow that Ole Woman to rise up and take over – the Holy Spirit convicts me taking me to my knees saying ” Oh God, I am so sorry I am lost my Peace or Sorry my tongue said that” ie: my behavior cultivated Sadness.. grieving me I  let God down.  Then my New woman in Christ starts praying, ” Lord, I know I AM part of the I AM please guide me and give me strength to walk with You and let your light shine keeping that ” old woman” down buried in the grave”  It isn’t long God shines His Grace, Love, Patience, Compassion, Frogiveness, Gratefulness, and that list goes on me and that needed strength grows within letting me Know….this is a growing time my child… seek My Word not that of those saying,  ” it’s ok we all loose it sometimes ya know we are not perfect’. And I think that at the time too.. However, I know we are to be striving to be who God created us to be and Not giving into those words of the Flesh.. I hear that still small voice say, ” don’t fall into that thinking, if you allow yourself to fall into excuses then you are feeding that attitude which only bears more of that fruit. Instead, see My Word and weed out those thoughts clearing your heart that You stick to walking in The Way of Love. ” that will bring Good Fruit.. remember, Life is all about choices. Choose His Way and in Him you DO have the power to do just that…thru His discipline and my being obedient the Light of Love will bear Good Fruit. This last week.. it was brought clearly to my attention this is where I need more cultivation. Where my Ole Woman tries her best to Rise up and take hold. God even used Joel Osteen to tap me up Hard in today’s service.. and on that note I will sign off saying, ” if you are in the same place with me.. listen to Joel’s message tonight on TBN ”  I plan on listening again and taking notes of helpful verses this time. Smile

Joel Osteen’s message today 12/10/17 https://www.tbn.org/programs/joel-osteen

Hugs.. Shalom.

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